Moving Day

Happy Saturday! Girlfriends Inspire Blog is moving, this site will be deactivated within the next few days. Hoping all my readers will join me as I launch Girlfriends Inspire Devotional a Collection of Writings by Elle Vita :) the new site will be www.msjevitamonique.wordpress.com. The site is still under construction and I am in the process of transferring. Please be patient with me as I am building and growing. This is just the beginning of a vision that is so great...💋

Thanks so much! 

Vita

I Often Wonder.......

I Often Wonder…..

I decided to participate in a blog “Link up”.  since I started this blog it has been my desire to expand my knowledge and get to know other writers. It is amazing the amount of support the community has for each other. The Link up is featured on a fellow writers page, her website is www.findingthegracewithin.com.

How awesome is she to allow other writers to be featured on her website? It is important for me to surround myself with people who are positive, and since I decided to pursue my writing career; God has just made it possible to be in the right place at the right time. I am no pro, I am a TOTAL amateur. Even though I jumped in this blind, God has been my light and he is guiding me through this. 

Every Tuesday at Ten she gives us a prompt and 6 days to link to the post! The prompt we had was “I wonder...” this prompt took my mind to many places. I am always wondering, hoping, dreaming and even regretting (which I am working on).

I often wonder……

I often wonder about my strength as a person, as a woman, and a mother. I wonder why I decided to lose strength at some point in my life and did not fight harder for myself. 

Why did I allow myself to stop dreaming, and made too many unnecessary bad choices. So many people with unfortunate setbacks in life still decided to pursue a better situation.

Why did I feel like I could not have the same? Why did I allow myself to fall victim so badly?  

Why did I deal with men that used and abused me, when I could have had a better life with someone who cared?

Why did I allow so called friends to discredit me and make me feel worst, when they were no better off? I wonder why I chose the hard way, verses easy.

Why could I not draw strength even for my children? All mothers do that right? 

So many questions, so many regrets, and life is better for me now.

While I have learned that God will take all the pain, mistakes and turn them around for my good-----for HIS glory. I still often wonder these things. I know that he will make it all come together and finish the good work he started in me (according to HIS word). I believe what he says he will do if I focus and live my life for him. No doubt!

But……

I still often wonder why I put myself through hell before FINALLY he said enough and really caught my attention. I grew tired. I was so tired and broken that God was my only choice. I often wonder why I did not allow myself to make him my first choice, he sacrificed his son for me.

The thing is I have not let go of a lot, and forgiving myself is an everyday journey. I hear people say all the time that they are so thankful for all they have been through, and that includes the good, and the bad. I cannot have those same thoughts right now. I just wish everything would have been “better”. It is one thing to have other people give up on you, but when you give up on yourself and feel worthless it is hard to understand. I have some amazing children, and I feel like I just should have been more for them. I should have been a better provider, a lot of things that we went through was unnecessary to me.

I often wonder will these thoughts go away. I have learned my true Identity in Christ. I believe it too. 

Every single day, I am renewed with a new opportunity to get up and see my children. I realized even though I made some pretty bad choices, I have privileged to do better each day. I have learned that my past does not define me. 

God gave me a vision of everything I can have, and that vision keeps me going in life. I am thankful that I am walking a purposed filled life. I have learned the power of remaining positive, and redirecting my thoughts from negativity. I have learned that I can always begin again. I have learned that tomorrow is not promised and I have to be grateful every single day.

With all that I have lost, I feel if I keep going on this path all will be restored. I have seen the evidence in the life of people who were so broken. God’s power is amazing, it hurts me when I see people who do not believe in his power. I know what has happened in my life, and how I could have not possibly pulled myself out of it. I did not have the mental capacity to want better, to do better for myself. Jesus saved my life. I was dying and no one knew it.

Even though I often wonder all of the above, I am learning too. Every day I am seeing evidence of how much strength I have. I am thankful, that I have been redeemed.

Have a Wonderful Evening!

Need to talk? Vent? Or have any questions?

Please contact me at: girlfriendsinspire@gmail.com

All email correspondence remain strictly confidential

 

© JeVita Owens 2015 All Rights Reserved

Redefine Your Identity: The TRUTH about you.....

  

 

I posted a Facebook status the other day, and it was talking about how we should be nicer to ourselves. That post resonated with a lot of people because we do join in when the world beats us up! We repent and still feel so badly, which means we haven't forgiven ourselves. 

I mentioned that we need to act like a child of Royalty, our father is KING! Hold your head up high and live! The reason people cannot do that is because they have not studied and meditated on the truth. The word of God defines exactly who you are; this is your only truth. God's truth was the turning point in my life. I pray that each and every one of my readers that come across this will allow the word of God to dictate how they live and feel about life.

 I have giving you the pleasure of providing the scripture reference. I make these personal to me so that I can begin to meditate and remember them in my heart.

·         Vita, the forgiven child…

Yet God freely and graciously declares that we are righteous. He did this through Christ Jesus when he freed us from the penalty for our sins. (Romans 3:23-24 NLT)

 

·         Vita, the set free child…

So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. And because you belong to him, the power of the life-giving Spirit has freed you from the power of sin that leads to death. (Romans 8:1-2 NLT)

 

·         Vita, the accepted child of God…

 I am writing to God’s church in Corinth, to you who have been called by God to be his own holy people. He made you holy by means of Christ Jesus, just as he did for all people everywhere who call on the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, their Lord and ours. (1 Corinthians 1:2 NLT)

 

·         Vita, the holy child of God…

 God has united you with Christ Jesus. For our benefit God made him to be wisdom itself. Christ made us right with God; he made us pure and holy, and he freed us from sin. (1 Corinthians 1:30 NLT)

 

·         Vita, the made-new child of God…

 This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun! (2 Corinthians 5:17 NLT)

 

·         Vita, the loved child of God…

 Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes. (Ephesians 1:4 NLT)

 

·         Vita, the close child of God…

 But now you have been united with Christ Jesus. Once you were far away from God, but now you have been brought near to him through the blood of Christ. (Ephesians 2:13 NLT)

 

·         Vita, the confident child of God…

 Because of Christ and our faith in him, we can now come boldly and confidently into God’s presence. (Ephesians 3:12 NLT)

 

·         Vita, the victorious child of God…

 No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us. (Romans 8:37 NLT)

I pray that the person who is reading let it resonate in your heart; it works when life gets hard for you. The truth always sets me free again! Do not believe the negativity that the devil has come to feed you. The truth is easier, as always. Blessings! You are a child of the King! Walk like Royalty.

 

Need to talk? Vent? Or have any questions?

Please contact me at: girlfriendsinspire@gmail.com

 

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All email correspondence remain strictly confidential

 

© JeVita Owens 2015 All Rights Reserved

 

 

My Life Changing Relationship

 

 

 

"The more we let God take us over, the more truly ourselves we become because he made us. He invented all the different people that you and I were intended to be…. It is when I turn to Christ when I give up myself to His personality, that I first begin to have a real personality of my own." ~C.S. Lewis

 It has been entirely too long since I have written a post on this blog. Had to take a halt due to, So many life changing adjustments and accomplishments. This writing situation is still new to me, as I begin to live boldly and chase a dream that I had hidden. This month I finally finished College, which is such an amazing accomplishment for me! When I started this blog, I had no idea how many people would grow to love it so fast. I am so thankful for all my readers; my mom told me the other day that I need to hurry up and post because I cannot leave everyone hanging on waiting! She is so right. During these past months, I also began to work on my relationship with God. Growing closer to God, I learned some valuable lesson, and I feel so free and peaceful. I also learned that the enemy will move strategically to stop me, I have to make sure that I have my full armor on like the book of Ephesians teaches us to. The relationship that I have with God now has totally changed my life. I have known God all my life, but I did not have a relationship with him. I have always known what I called the basics; the Ten Commandments, he died for my sin, he loves me…all of those things. I was not living it, and even when I tried to live it I did not focus on him. The only focus I had was on the problems and issues that were in my life at that time.

EVERYTHING I know about him he is teaching me in the exact way I need to learn.  This relationship actually keeps me happy, and sane when the entire world is jumping on my nerve. I and My God are connected and that is what a relationship is; when two or more people are connected! It is not religion and chants. We sit and we enjoy the company of each other. I know he will never require me to be anything that I am not, and nothing I do in this world can make him stop ever loving me.

 

I have a Confession; now that I am able to have this renewed relationship with the father, I am able to have successful relationships with other people. I am a person that can enjoy healthy relationships, but I am also a person that people actually want to be around. Sadly, misery loves company and in a previous season of my life I truly was a miserable woman. I know some people may shake their heads at that, but it is my truth. I had some connections, but most of them were formed out of codependency.  Codependent relationships are when you attach yourself to another human being and it becomes a very unhealthy existence for all parties involved. I just had to have someone around because the thought of loneliness was too much for me to deal with. (I will come back on the LOVELY part of being alone later) I would take just any type of treatment so that the other person would not leave. I allowed myself to be abused verbally and physically, yep! I allowed people to use me, and to make me feel less than I was. Satan had a great time making me think I was worthless. I think back at this now and I still get sad that I allowed such people in my life and that I allowed this to manifest into truth. I grew tired of those types of relationships, the final straw was losing everything due to an emotional breakdown. I grew tired of people using me up and walking away. I guess now I can thank them because it allowed me to run into my father’s arms. Now I will never leave, the love is too good.

OH!! That feeling of being "lonely" that scared me so bad? That was necessary so that he can work on me, and that I could hear him without distraction. The more I grew closer to him those lonely days seem filled. I will not say there aren't times when I still would like companionship. It is a priority that I have the "right" companionship.

Many people believe before they come to God they have to be a certain way, they must pray or dress a particular way. Lies. They feel like the Bible is boring and prayer does not work.  I can truly understand that feeling. I say….who says you have to learn the Bible a particular type of way? My studies came from devotionals, and reading spiritual books and just listening. The more I read and let it manifest, the more I desired it. That will happen for anyone, I can guarantee it! As far as prayer is concerned, who says a simple prayer is not enough? I literally pray throughout the day. The more you pray about connecting with Gods vision, the other stuff will come naturally. It is many reasons WHY people feel they cannot develop a relationship with God. Then some people just have not had enough of their sinful nature; that was me. I didn't have enough. However, I knew the life I was living was not how I was supposed to live. So I just told God the truth. My prayer was something like this:

"God, I see how other people in the church seem to be excited and in love with everything about you. I know what the word says, but I do not feel that way about you. I am truly ashamed, but I know you can help me. Help me to not be fearful of loving you, and living for you. I have certain things in my life as you know that I do not want to let go. These things bring me comfort, I enjoy them because truthfully nothing else in life is going right. Help me to know your love, help me to find peace in joy and get excited. Help me to know you so I can trust you. I do not know how long my journey will be, but I trust you indefinitely with helping me."

 

Seriously, that was like a ton of bricks lifted off my shoulder and immediately my life changed. It was not that I stopped doing certain things or fell totally in love with Christ overnight. I begin to crave him, he also began to show me how wonderful he has always been. It was like my eyes were open. This is a relationship that will save your life. The things I found comfort in, no longer were comfortable. My entire surrounding began to change, I began to lose everything that was a comfort zone that served him no purpose. Glory!

I am excited. When I feel lousy, I am still excited because I know that emotions are not ruling me, I feel it then it is gone. God is going to take care of every aspect of my life. He does not even need my help one bit. I surrender!!

 

Much Love, Xoxo

Elle Vita

 

 

Need to talk? Vent? Or have any questions?

Please contact me at: girlfriendsinspire@gmail.com

All email correspondence remain strictly confidential

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Inspire.Love.Healing

 

© JeVita Owens 2015 All Rights Reserved

 

 

Agape: Love with no limits

Good Day Girlfriends!

God’s love---Agape. The most fulfilling, genuine, ultimate love.

Love really is a beautiful thing. It is an old cliché that is true. Love is also the most complicated emotion, because we as humans do not fully grasp the concept of how healing love can be. We do not understand the healing power, the need to dwell in love all the time. I figure every one of us wants to be loved, I always say if you do not think you need love, you need it the most. When I think about love I am not just talking about a man and a woman’s union of love. I am talking about the love we have for mankind. The love people show to each other. The entire concept that Jesus speaks of when he says “Love thy neighbor”.

Love is a struggle for most of us because we really do not even know what we are looking for. We do not understand the depth of love. I use to cringe when people said “I Love you”. I knew often they were just mouthing the words that sounded good. I learned a long time ago that the love we humans show each other was not real. It came with way too many conditions.

I will forever believe, that love holds healing power to restore brokenness. I did not understand what love was most of my life until a few years ago. It seem to me that people only loved you for a short time. Of course I knew what it was portrayed on television, and from what I heard. I also knew it was something I wanted and it seemed so wonderful. Not only did I not understand it, I also did not know how to give it back in the correct form. Sadly, I craved what I did not even know a thing about. I have always been the type of person even from a very small child; who looked at the actions of people. I did not believe what your mouth said. So even though all my life various people said “I Love You” I knew from their actions that could not hold truth. However, I know now that people cannot give you love, when they have not experienced it, and was not taught about love. It is accurate that we can only give, as much as we know. Sometimes that is still extremely damaging….Onward.

When I decided to allow God to work me over, I begin to receive messages of love from EVERYWHERE. God begin to deal with me on a deeper level to study love. I remember it dropped in my spirit that if you only would study my love, it will heal every single ounce of pain. WOW! Well I needed healing badly. I can still hear it. I teach it and pass it on. People need to be set free from feeling like love is missing, and feeling empty.

I must say I have went to church all my life, and I am thankful those roots were instilled in me, but it was quite obvious that I did not pay attention much. I remember looking at other people on fire for God and so excited about how he was moving in their lives, as well as the church. I remember hearing the church sister and brothers talk about the love that made them feel so complete.  I did not feel that, and I knew I could not fake it either. As far as I was concern, I could not feel or see God. He was invisible. I would pray to God and ask him to help me fall in love with him, and to help me understand his love for me as well. (Never stopped praying)

The Bible tells us that we have three things that will last forever. The three things are faith, hope, and love; love is the GREATEST!! (1 Corinthians 13:13).  In the Bible when Jesus is teaching the Pharisees ask Jesus what is the greatest commandment of all. He replied to them and told them that we are to love our God with all our heart, all our soul, and all our mind! (Matthew 22:37) He also went on to make sure he told him that this was the first and the greatest commandment.

Think about it for a second. Why is it that when you think of love you get excited and feel a sense of safety? Love makes you feel great all over. Think about this too: Why is it when we feel love is lost that it destroys us inside? We feel so weak and vulnerable. Love lost often even leaves us feeling damage that is unrepairable. The reason is because we were made in the image of God, so if the scriptures tell me that God is love, I am love too. However, human nature and our sinful world has molded and tarnished us from being like the perfect image of God. However, our spirit still needs that love that we were made from. God made us so he could love us! That is enough to build a foundation of truth on. God made us for his pleasure, he wanted to love us.

What some people fail to understand is that one small gesture of love can go a long way. By walking in love we can help change lives. You never know what someone is needing and how they are feeling. Just for myself recently, the love from friends and associates helped God make me whole again. It was seeking the knowledge of God’s love that completed my life. It was learning Gods love that made me dream again, love the correct way, and be the best woman I can be for everyone in my life. It was Gods love that helped me defeat depression, anxiety, and panic attacks. God’s love that save my life, and made me want to live again. All God…he is love. Now I can feel it.

God’s love---Agape. The most fulfilling, genuine, ultimate love.

I cannot explain how complete it makes me feel. All I can say is that if you are hurting, and searching for that one true love, try Our Lord and Savior. He will wrap you in his loving arms and remove all pain. The feelings of being inadequate will go away. It did for me, and I still have many struggles, but knowing I am loved by God is not one.

Agape…get into it with your Savior!!

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. (1 Corinthians 13:4-7 NLT)

 

Need to talk? Vent? Or have any questions?

Please contact me at: girlfriendsinspire@gmail.com

All email correspondence remain strictly confidential

 

© JeVita Owens 2015 All Rights Reserved

 

 

Checking In!! Mental goodies...

 

 

 

 

Girlfriends!!

Hope all of you are having a wonderful week and most importantly a good start to the New Year. Seems like my circle of friends and associates have been having a powerful start! As they should too, they love the Lord and give him so much praise! Tonight's blog is nothing in my opinion that is so deep, or profound. I just kind of want to be candid and chat to my readers about myself and some lessons, I have learned along the way. Nevertheless, I always hope that my words inspire someone. Transparency is the hardest thing for me to be, on my new found walk towards my purpose. It is getting much easier every day. I enjoy sharing now. 

It's sad to me that sometimes as people we just have to be careful how much to share with people. I learn some conversations are left strictly between you and God. Truth is most people don't care and will throw stuff back in your face. They definitely won't keep things confidential. 

I just want you all to know, I am here if you ever need to vent or just a shoulder. I do not proclaim to have all the answers, but I will try my best to find out what I don't know.  

This is my life's purpose. I love what I do, and this is just thee VERY beginning. I use to wonder why God did I go through so many things in my life, could I just die to end it all? I remember feeling no reason for being, not even for my children. I figured they were better off without me anyway. Sad thing is some people even encouraged me to believe that.  

One of my good friends said to me one day that she couldn't understand why I was always getting hit so hard like bad luck followed me. I actually began to think I was a curse to myself and people. Satan had my mind so messed up smh! I would be in denial if I didn't say, I caused many screw ups in my life. I never meant anyone harm. 

Well, I am thankful and proud to say those days are behind me. That does not mean that trials will not come my direction. I just learn a better way of thinking and dealing with it all. I can handle my issues better and take full responsibility when things go wrong.  God never said I would not have trials, setbacks, disappointments, and pain.

 

 

 

I was gifted with the ability to love. I considered myself to be an overly sensitive person, BUT that is who I needed to be to fulfill my purpose in this world. I have the gift to help people overcome. Even with my help, ultimately it is up to the individual. In this life, you have to choose to eat or be eaten! I have experienced some terrible things in my life. Some are every bit of my fault; some were pain caused by others. I am 33 years old and have lived a life that most people couldn't survive. Some physical, some mental. I have always found it humorous when people think they know me. Truth is, there isn't a person walking the earth who know the very details of what I've been through...they only know the outcome as it began to spill over. I know one day I will have to share private details, but for now God knows I'm not ready. I adapted the victim mentality so well; this isn't a testimony of a victim anymore. I no longer feel the need for pity.  Occasionally, when I fall into my feelings, and yes it happens! I wonder why I am not legit locked up in a mental institution. Why didn't God just let me die so many times....I've said before, I was dying, and no one even knew. I don't think they even cared. 

God built me tough like a Chevy! I take a hit. Get right back up. I've been weak. Mind tormented. Through it all, even I'm the midst of confusion, there was a seed planted. I KNEW this was not life, I refused to believe it....so I never stop praying. Never stop seeking help. No one ever came to save me. I was drowning in despair. People have their problems and until something awful happens, no one will notice. Or they will judge. Or they will talk about you behind your back, and then you will hear...But God, he saved me. 

I also had to eliminate bad company. I had to learn to be alone, and dismiss the loneliness that I thought was killing me. Screw that feeling of being alone. You ever realize when you are keeping bad company, you still feel very much alone? 

It is some life changing truth to you attracting exactly the person that you are! I heard that before and did not want to accept that, I have even very recently told someone else that, and they refuse to receive it. I just plant the seed and allow people to grow at their pace. NOW, I have so many friends and associates that are like minded. I stopped long ago searching for the light and decided to become the light myself.  

If you are so fortunate to have a great circle of friends, then you understand the value that brings to your life. I feel like God's light is shining so bright directly on me. I feel like it took too long to get here. However, I refuse to dwell on it. I am just happy I am here. I am glad to help anyone who needs it.  I am still learning, and I am still a process.

Sometimes I still slip back into a depression, but usually it comes and goes. God has renewed my heart so well. He is working it out! I enjoy encouraging others and uplifting their spirits. I love being the one person anybody can lean on. I am honored people trust me so much; with the pain that torments them. My answers all go back to My Lord and Savior. If he can do it for me, no doubt he will do it for anybody. 

 

 

 

 

Need to talk? Vent? Or have any questions

Please contact me at: girlfriendsinpire@gmail.com

All email correspondence remain strictly confidential 

© JeVita Owens 2015 All Rights Reserved

But....did you pray?

But did you pray?

 

I have attended plenty of sermons, and teachings on prayer and trust me the entire praying message can get pretty deep. It should be deep. Prayer is our communication with the divine. Prayer has changed my life in so many ways that I could not even rescue myself from. This is not going to be a boring long drawn out blog about praying. This is my girlfriends perspective as if we were sitting face to face chatting it up! 

Prayer IS the solution.

Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. (Philippians 4:6 NLT)

Trust me on this one. Very briefly, I will describe what I though prayer should be, versus what God has revealed in my heart. I think this will be life changing for some people. The reason I feel this is important is because the message from this blog came to me early in the morning after a night of discussing many issues, with a dear friend of mines. I asked her “but…did you pray about it?” Then this morning after my prayer time and studying my Bible and devotionals, I read something about prayer. So I knew this needed my girlfriend's perspective. 

One thing I want us also to remember is; that when we do pray, God is going to handle the situation in his timing and his perfect way. Do not be discourage if answers to prayers go delayed, or even unanswered. If you prayers line up with Gods will, it shall be. Just like any parent, God is our father and sees the bigger picture, and he sees the future, so no you may not win the lottery for 500 million dollars because it is not good for you!! And maybe gambling and taking those risk are not the best option for your life either. I am just saying!

How I thought I was supposed to pray.

Growing up I attended prayer meetings, and they were powerful. Throughout the years, I felt like I had to pray for a certain amount of time, or I had to make sure I was crying, snotty, and speaking in tongues or my prayers were not valid. I thought that if I did not "tarry" for the Lord for hours then my prayers were not adequate. Basically, I felt a prayer had to be no less that an hour long. Now no one ever said that was so. I just thought that, because of the prayer meetings I attended as a child. Well, when I began to be on my own as an adult and wanted to search for God to help me. I could not get an hour prayer out. I just did not know what to say for an entire hour. I did not feel like I was in the spirit enough to speak in tongues. Realistically, I could not devote hours to prayer because I had small children that were demanding my time. So I stopped praying. I felt like I did not measure up anyway so what was the point? 

Pray without ceasing. (1 Thessalonians 5:17 KJV)

Believing that way was the biggest trick from Satan, I drew me further away from God and I just totally shut him out. It was not because I did not want to pray, I believed a lie. Well, I am here to tell you….NEVER STOP PRAYING!! 

God told me to Pray

One day a few years back, God began to minister to my heart from various sources, and I began to receive him more. He placed back in my heart the desire for prayer. He wanted me to study prayer and communicate with him regardless of how I "thought" because see the way "I" think is not in line with his perfect thoughts. He made it very clear that I could come to him and talk about anything. Instead of picking up the phone to whine and get advice. I could pray. I could speak to him just like I did my friends. The beautiful part about it was God could  resolve the problems. I mean let us just think about it for a minute; we sit on the phone for hours with our friends or family and cry our eyes out looking for advice on how to overcome. We barely listens to the advice, or we might even resent the advice. Nothing changes. We cannot do it, and other people cannot bring us the peace that God can. I started to talk to God about those problems so profound that I could not share with people. Even the simple problems that I could talk to people about I still go to God first in prayer. I  talk to God all day, and he speaks back to me with answers. God has become my friend. That is how we can begin building our prayer life. Talk to God like he is your friend…respectfully and humble, of course. 

How can I begin to build my prayer life?

Simple. Talk to God. I do not care who says you must pray for a certain amount of hours, or that your small prayers are not enough. You must do what you can, God sees your heart, and he sees the desire. People will always have their  perspective, and it is good to take advice but just like with most advice you can be inspired and still do what is truly best for you. True Story: In the beginning I talked to God about 15 minutes at a time all day! Every little step counts.

There are prayer instructions in the Bible that gives us guidelines on how to pray and what we should do. Refer to Matthew 6:9-13

Jesus gave us clear instruction on how to go along with a basic prayer of praise and acknowledgment. Never stop praying. Giving thanks and gratitude. Also, when you begin to pray, believe that what you pray for can be resolved. Prayer is pointless without faith. So as much as you think about it, pray about it.

(Let me be clear, I am not disregarding long prayer sessions when you are in need and the Holy Spirit takes over. I have those often, and I have spent hours in prayer when I needed to because my holy spirit just must have known what I needed. I have cried and pulled myself up off the floor. I remember one occasion I had to pull myself up out of the tub because what was going on in my life was that heavy. So yes, there will be times when we pray that it will get intense. Prayer is intense. This blog is speaking for those who are lost like I was with how to build an effective prayer life and making it work for you, always with Gods direction).

Why pray?

We pray for so many reasons. We pray for other people and their journey. We pray to communicate with God and show him how we adore him. We pray when we are sad. We should  pray when we are happy too.

God wants to hear from us. When I have been in tough situations and no matter how hard I searched for an answer, some inspiration, some guidance, some healing, or some relief I never fully got it. Through prayer and having faith I have been renewed. You can be renewed too. Give God a chance, and talk to him.

“We have to pray with our eyes on God, not on the difficulties.” 

― Oswald Chambers

Need to talk? Vent? Or have any questions?

Please contact me at: girlfriendsinspire@gmail.com

All email correspondence remain strictly confidential

 

 

© JeVita Owens 2015 All Rights Reserved

Concrete Bloom: Loving yourself wholeheartedly and accepting your process.

"Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy— the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light." ~Brene Brown

 

 

 Out from the concrete a beautiful Rose forms…….it is truly a miracle.

 

The domestic victim.
The mistreated.
The single parent.
The low self-worth
The depression.
The promiscuous.
The drug addict.
The orphan.
The terminal illness.
The abandon.
The displaced.

 I will stop here. All of this is heavy, concrete heavy. This list can go on, and I do not intend to leave anyone's personal situation out. It is all too heavy and the point of this blog is not to dwell on the issues. The focus is how we as women are gentle, beautiful flowers that carry the heaviness of a concrete slab. Even with the setbacks we still break through, rising flawless and powerful, and beautiful as God intended us to be!

 Loving yourself wholeheartedly is something I learned from Brene Brown! She had this to say about it:

 "Wholehearted living is about engaging in our lives from a place of worthiness. It means cultivating the courage, compassion, and connection to wake up in the morning and think, No matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough. It's going to bed at night thinking, Yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid, but that doesn't change the truth that I am also brave and worthy of love and belonging."

 

That was a clip from her book "The Gifts if Imperfections". Great read FYI !! I've added to my list or recommendations for my followers!

 

You can do this!

 That is if you want to.
Break through the foundations of the pain.
The setbacks.
The mistakes.
The bad choices.
Girlfriends you are valuable, worthy, capable, strong, and made to be victorious.

I know some days it is hard, it is heavy. I describe it as a weight on your chest. Can't breath sometimes. Pace your breaths and keep going. I'm not naïve to the issues that come along with life, especially when you have tried so hard and keep falling short. Trust, girlfriends I GET IT!

 The  pressure to have it all "together" all the time. The criticism from others if you fall short, or if some "thing" doesn't go as others perceive it should. Not once does anyone ever stop to think maybe this is just hard. The judgment of you brought this on yourself rings loud. Sometimes we are just our  worst enemy ( I admit this was me, often) Or what can I do to fix this? Or maybe if I act like I don't see what is going on, I just will not deal with it. So many scenarios, so many neglects. So, so many ways we stay under the concrete.

The world can leave you so bitter. It's real out here. It's up to you to decided to live.

How you choose to live is your choice alone. No judgment from me, and I do not accept a judgment from others. How I decide to live is my choice. Who said we would get it right every time, because we will not. Some of us just hide it better than others. Who said my pace of success and healing is the same as yours? Who says it is better? Begin to love yourself wholeheartedly, meaning your flaws and setbacks. Be kind and gentle with your process of improvement. Take your time, and believe God will work it out. 

I find it hilarious when people ask me how do I have it all together now? Or how is it that I can not let the pressure of the world get to me? Or my new favorite was ( and this was a malicious attack) Oh so now you little Ms. Perfection? 

All of the above couldn't be further from the truth. What  changed was a simple thing; the way I dealt with loving me wholeheartedly. Several prayers to God, therapy ( yes, not once but twice! And I LOVE it). Forgiveness, acceptance, responsibility, all played an enormous part. Being authentic and genuine was an important factor. People including myself are excellent at faking it. Everything is not alright, and that is ok. We put on this mask; then we lie to cover up when actually all hell is breaking lose. I did a LOT of covering up, and in my mind I wasn't lying. It was like this; I'll tell you what you need to know, everything else is "fine". Well, it was not. I did not realize that was okay. Be authentic and genuine every time, even if you do not feel like doing it. It helps the healing. A beautiful way of telling people to stay out your business is kindly reminding them to "count their blessings, not yours". I use that quite often these days :)

It was one simple thing that  to me, was not very simple at all. Letting go and believing in myself.

I personally  struggled with believing that my life could get better. I was doomed in my opinion, written off and miserable. At this point in my life, I had released the victim mentality but is still carried low self-worth, because no I had to be responsible for my life! How could I let all this happen? Why was I NOT strong enough?

Even with all the prayers and therapy, I still had some disconnects. I was  better, and I could feel an awakening in myself occurring. I did not realize then, that where I was at that moment in life was ok. I was going through my process, my timing, my journey. As long as I knew I was trying, and God knew what we discuss that was enough. I think back and wish I would have been kinder to myself. More patient and loving. See, girlfriends I was rushing, I wanted acceptance and approval, and  for someone to  validate that I was ok in life. But from whom? The truth is God is all that  matters, and he accepted me before, I ever existed!! AMEN. 

Concrete Bloom

 The decision to bloom into all you were meant to be is truly yours. However long that takes is not to be determined by anyone. I can't stress enough to be kind to yourself because you will not meet the mark often. Even as you grow to accept yourself wholeheartedly, there will just be days. Life just happens. How you spend your life and accept what happens is all on you. Your environment, success, failures, health, and relationships all are controlled by you, in every single circumstance you have a choice. I suggest  the best choice to make is the decision you can live with and accept whatever consequence that may occur. 

Live. Girlfriend, break out of that pain and bloom into the flower. I know many, many concrete roses. Stories were far more challenging that mines, however that doesn't discount my grief. It just inspired me that I can overcome. The decision was mine. I often say I stop searching for he light and decided to become one instead. That is precisely when my life changed for the better. I began to practice acceptance and love of myself first. Then I discovered my purpose ( that is another blog ). When I allowed God and the Holy Spirit to invade my life truly, I began to rediscover myself, and I started to dream and set goals. I found the woman that I was. I knew she was there. She got lost. My dreams and purpose have not only been implanted, with a renewed life I have energy and motivation to get up and put in work! And I don't mind working this hard to create my legacy, I don't mind dreaming bigger than I can ever imagine. Ask, believe, and received.

 

Overlooked, to overbooked.
Everything in my life I want for myself is to help other people and glorify God in the process. He planted that seed in me years ago, and now she had bloomed.

Not only am I a BEAUTIFUL flower, but I am a light to many people. I am a light to my children, even more important I am a light to myself. I accept myself, and that was my turning point of breaking through my concrete.

Now does everyone accept or believe that I have "changed" ( I don't like the word changed when referring to my process, because truthfully I am still me. I'm better, healed but still me and nothing is wrong with me)? Does everyone believe in my vision or goals? Am I accepted as a "light" now? Heck no. Difference between "then" and "now" is I have my  belief for my life. Being accepted, or rejected by anyone is not a factor for achieving my dream, it is no longer the moving force for my work. I do this because I love it, because I believe in me because I was destine for greatness. Now I know that, and I feel it. Christ strengthens me to continue keep moving onward. No one human on earth. 

So I challenge you today to bloom. What is it you love to do in life? What is holding you back? What makes you happy and smile? If you could be anything in the world what would it be? Why? Think about bad habits.

 

Self-defeating behaviors.

Say affirmations every day.
Pray.
Believe in yourself, believe you can break through.
And please be patient with yourself and kind to your process.

 

Learn to live wholeheartedly, accepting you! God already does. That's enough to build your life on!

Xoxo Elle Vita

 Questions? Concerns? Need to chat? or even vent? all emails are confidential.  Please contact me at: girlfriendsinspire@gmail.com